June 30

June 30, 2010

I thought if I kept myself really busy , these dates will slip by quietly.

But as usual God likes to mess with my head and makes me face things which I try to run away from.

Yes, I can run but I cannot hide.

Early this week, I got an email which pulled me back from my self-imposed black hole, and even though I tried to be brave about this, I really can’t. No use to pretend I am super woman, obviously it is not working.

Once again I had to face the significance of these dates.

–He would have celebrated his 56th birthday this month.

–tomorrow would have been our 32 nd Anniversary.

His mom, brother and sister flew in from Regina to visit.   They do not want to forget him. That really made me feel even worse.

The truth is: It is sad to remember and hard to forget.

I wish I had told him I love him more often, and not just once in a while.

I wish I had been more forgiving, and not spent so much time getting mad.

I wish I had told him how much I appreciate him…..instead of making fun of him.

You tend to take people for granted until they are gone.

I wish people who are going through marital problems will learn these lessons before it is too late:

Hold on to each other a little tighter, and let the other stuff go….they are not worth it.

For one of these days you will find yourself  feeling sad when you try to remember, and even harder  when you try to forget.