the kitchen mat

On September 2, the dreaded call finally came …

“She is gone.”

Those three little words cut deeply into my soul and the world got dimmer.

A husband has lost his wife of 39 years….

Three young people have lost their mom…

An aging frail woman has lost her only daughter…

…many have lost a good friend, a mentor, a counselor……. and I have lost a sister in law.

Even though we were only related through marriage, she was like a sister to me in so many ways. For the past few years she had been my sounding board, accountability partner and a shoulder for me to cry on. Her passing from this earth has left a gaping hole in a lot of people’s lives including mine.

The other day as i was cooking breakfast, the frozen bag of hash brown slipped out of my hand, broke open and spat all over the place and landed on the kitchen mat. As I was cleaning up my mess it suddenly dawned on me what this mat means to me. It was few years ago when I visited her at her home, instantly I was drawn to her new kitchen mat, as I have never seen one that wide– “This mat will go nicely in my kitchen.” I had mentioned casually. And when she came over months later, she whipped out from her bag a brand new kitchen mat she had brought for me when she traveled down south ! This pretty well summed up her character : She was a kind sensitive soul who was always concerned about the welfare of others. She would try her best to care for people around her and it came naturally for her.


On September 9, family and friends came together for a Celebration of Life service to honor our beloved, it was evident that many have been touched by her. One thing which really stood out was how people described her as a “Proverbs 31” woman: Her husband told me that she was the glue of their family and had inspired everyone to do his and her best. The fact today he is able to shepherd God’s people as an ordained pastor is a result of her encouragement and support.

23 Her husband is respected at the city gate,
where he takes his seat among the elders of the land.

26 She speaks with wisdom,
and faithful instruction is on her tongue.
27 She watches over the affairs of her household
and does not eat the bread of idleness.
28 Her children arise and call her blessed;
her husband also, and he praises her:

29“Many women do noble things,
but you surpass them all.”
30 Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting;
but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.
31 Honor her for all that her hands have done,
and let her works bring her praise at the city gate.”

Our loss is Heaven’s gain! Even though she is no longer here on earth, she had spread and left the aroma of Christ in the lives of many people. As one of her children had quoted eloquently “I know she is still with me and that my good choices are the best ways to remember and honor her”.

To me, the kitchen mat symbolizes her legacy. Definitely money, success and fame are not it. It is what she left behind that has the power to change lives to impact the kingdom of God. Furthermore, it also aspires me to work on the same thing to pass on to our next generation.

Thank you my dear sister for the gift of your kitchen mat and for being my role model.

Rest in peace !



About mamaj

mom with two grown up girls, children pastor, avid knitter, coffee-lover, bear-collector. I love reading, hanging out with my girl friends and yes, I am owned by a golden lab, Jaden.

Posted on October 13, 2013, in Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink. 1 Comment.

  1. What a beautiful tribute to your sister-in-law. So sorry for your loss.

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